September 19, 2011

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Busy Boasting "A life of constant overcommitment is not a sign of success, or something to be bragged about. It is a sign of imbalance, a sign we have put our faith in the gospel of busyness instead of in a God who dares us to trust Him and be willing to rest." -- Mason Slater Okay, so I am totally guilty of this. My core sin is laziness, and it affects everything I do, including how much pride I take in being busy. You see, if I could demonstrate to others how productive my daily life is, then they have to give me credit for being a hard worker and not the lazy, read-all day-at-Starbucks, marathon-tv-show-watching person I know I am on the inside. I almost literally just had the conversation that begins Slater's article: “How have you been recently?” “Oh, I'm not too bad. I’m taking a few classes, working two jobs, volunteering at church and on the side I’m writing a novel. I hardly sleep and practically live on coffee, but it’s great. What have you been up to?” “Me? Just work I guess.” “That must be nice." [thinks: slacker] Of course, that wasn't me thinking the working person was a slacker; I actually was envying her the ability to relax when she got home, rather than spend every second of her non-kid-waking hours on the computer. But did I feel pride in stating all I was doing? Yes! It's interesting, this stay-at-home-working-mom thing. When I worked full time, all I wanted was to be able to stay at home with my children to raise them myself. But I don't do that. I am home with them way more than if I had a full-time job, but I still do work that much, just whenever I can fit it in. This way, I can explain to other stay-at-home moms that although I do work, I work mostly from home and can raise my children the way they need to be raised. But for those who look down on stay-at-home moms, I can point to my work and accomplishments with a childish, "See?! You're not better than me, either." And all of this to defend the core of the problem: "Even though I would much rather be that stay-at-home mom who watches soap operas all day, I'm not because I know that would be totally bad for society. And my kids. And others who see me wearing skinny jeans. So don't look down on me!" Often, when I feel overcommitted- usually on the weekends- I worry about when I can fit everything in. And instead of waiting on God, of giving him the firstfruits of my time and productivity, I try to carve out time to just do my job. But guess what? I end up distracted (usually by Facebook) and inefficient. On the other hand, every single time I choose to sacrifice the urgent in favor of sitting down with God, I make the right decision and somehow find...

Rachel

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